How about a movie that's all over the map? In "Park Avenue Logger"(1937) big George O'Brien stars as "Grant Curran", son of a wealthy New York industrialist. His father has brought in a shrink to talk to Grant, he's thinks his son's a wimp and says, "something's wrong with him Doc, he's got no red blood. All he wants to do is study science and go to the symphony. Can't you make a man out of him"? The old man is a self made millionaire, he came up the hard way and wants Grant to do the same, but Grant is an intellectual, refined and articulate. However (and it's one of those long stretched-out howevers), what Dad doesn't know is that, by night, Grant is a wrestler known as "The Masked Marvel". He wrestles because he loves it (and he's good), but he doesn't want his manager to tell his father, because, with the total lack of communication between father and son, Grant thinks his Dad appreciates his intellectual pursuits, and would be horrified to find out that he wrestles. He has no idea Dad thinks he's a fruitcake. Therefore, let the hijinks begin! Or so you'd think, right? Because that setup would be enough for most screenplays, and you could get a good screwball comedy of that theme alone, but the wrestling motif gets thrown aside after the first ten minutes, when Grant is packed off to (of all places) a logging camp in Oregon that's owned by his Dad. The shrink has suggested this as a chance for Grant to work hard and become a man.
So off he goes to Oregon, and wouldn't you know it, there's a pretty girl (Beatrice Roberts) who's running another logging company at the camp, and now we've got a rom/com in the making, because you can't waste a George O'Brien smile if you're the director. The problem is that she's Ward Bond's gal. He's working for her father, who owns the other logging company (several companies work at one camp), and he, along with the foreman, are sabotaging trains to run off the tracks and dump logs, so that they can bankrupt Beatrice's father and take over his business. But now that Grant is making inroads with her, Ward Bond's days of subterfuge may be over.
But I mean, hang on for a second. We started off on Park Avenue in Noo Yawk, with a besuited Grant Curran talking science with the shrink and getting ready to attend the symphony. Dad thinks he's a girlie-man (the shrink disagrees), but because Dad is rich and calls the shots, Grant is sent to a logging camp, after we find out he's a pro wrestler.
Talk about throwing in the kitchen sink! Add several minutes of stock footage of real logging camp activity, lumberjacks felling trees and yelling Timm-berrrr!, some shots of logs splashing in a lake as they make their run to the mill (the cinematographer must've loved these shots and insisted on their inclusion, because the water-splash is downright poetic looking), and then the train derailments, and financial subterfuge.
There's even a barn dance with a battle over Beatrice Roberts, who likes Grant better than Ward Bond by now, to keep the rom/com angle going. Then she finds out Grant's real identity, that he's the son of the rich New Yorker Curran, and she dumps him like a hot potater and runs back to Ward Bond, who's not playing the hard guy for a change. Usually, he's the threat in any movie he's in, but this time he's a little scared of George O'Brien. Add in a balding, mustachioed, eastern European union official, who wants to "pension" all the loggers (and who mangles his English for comic relief), and you have one of the more unique blends of scriptsmanship that we've seen in many a moon. It all boils down - as it usually does in these films - to who the gal is gonna marry. Ward Bond has the upper hand until the last five minutes, but then O'Brien frames him with a pickpocket routine that will have you shaking your head, and some exposition to explain the whole plot, just in case you missed anything. The result? A good time is had by all.
Two Big Thumbs Up for "Park Avenue Logger", just because it's goofy, and because you can't go wrong with George O'Brien. Any actor who can do off-the-wall Screwball like this, and who was a huge Western star, and on top of that was the star of "Sunrise" (one of the most tremendous films ever made), has to be considered one of the greatest actors of all time. On a side note, the very beautiful Beatrice Roberts was Louis B. Mayer's girlfriend, and a 1925 Miss America contestant. The picture is soft, but very watchable, and the movie is highly recommended. ////
The previous night, we saw Tom Tyler again, this time as a rabble rouser, in "Born to Battle"(1935). There's nothing like a runaway wagon to open a Western, and as Tom and his buddies are out raising hell, he sees a wagon racing out of control and rides like the wind to stop it. This gives Yakima Canutt a chance to do his signature "horse-to-horse" stunt jump. Of course, there's a pretty girl at the reins, with her pa (pretty girls always live with their widowed fathers in these movies), and at first she doesn't like Tom, even though he rescued her wagon, because she knows he's a petty criminal. Back in town, he shows how he got his reputation by tearing up a Chinese laundry. The sign on the door says "Wun Lung Laundry" (hardy-har-har, sorry but it's a riot), and when Tom doesn't have his receipt, the proprietor actually says "no tickee, no washee". I thought that was just an urban legend, but apparently it's real dialogue, at least in this movie, and it too is funny. Well, when the guy won't give him his shirt, Tyler busts up the joint. He gets arrested, and the judge - who was in the middle of a cribbage game - hears his case and sentences Tom to sixty days or a hefty fine.
Tom doesn't have the dough, so he's about to do the time. Then, a man in a suit steps up and identifies himself as the owner of the Lazy J Ranch. He offers to pay Tom's fine if the judge will turn him over. The judge, needing money because he lost all of his in the cribbage game, says "that will be okay sir, the town could use the money" (meaning HE could use the money), and the gentleman pays the fine and Tom goes with him. It turns out that the man wants Tom to take over the management of his ranch. He's heard Tom's a good enforcer, and he's trying to settle up with some squatters on his property. He wants to do it legally and without violence. He thinks Tom Tyler is the man for the job.
So, Tom accepts, and goes to a bar to celebrate his new job. There, a Big Galoot (Richard Alexander) challenges him to a fight after first challenging the whole bar crowd. Tyler beats him up (after a lengthy punchout) and the guy says, "you'll do just fine". It turns out he was just playing Tom all along, and the fight was staged, to see if Tom would take him on. Now that the Galoot knows Tom's a tough man, he introduces him to his boss, "Mr. Brownell" (William Desmond), the very man Tyler has been hired to replace at the Lazy J Ranch.
Well, things get complicated from here. The plot devolves into comedy for a spell, when Tom meets two cowhands on the range. One is a dust-merchant named "Blinky" (Nelson McDowell), the other is actor Julian Rivero, who's once again doing his pompous/ridiculous Mexican Bandito thing. For a time, hijinx replaces the story. But then, we find out that Blinky and Julio have been hired to get rid of the nesters by Richard Alexander, the Big Galoot who started the bar fight. Alexander is secretly in opposition to his boss Mr. Brownell, and is threatening the nesters with force so he can take over the ranch.
When Tom Tyler hears that Alexander is planning to kill off the nesters, he comes to the rescue of the pretty girl and her pa, who Alexander has put in a makeshift jail. Then Mr. Brownell finds out that Alexander is a crook, and asks Tyler to help him stop the takeover.
It's great stuff as always, and fun to see Tom Tyler playing a roustabout. The movie was shot in Agoura when there was not a building or freeway in sight. Nelson McDowell as "Blinky" is one of our earliest actors, born in 1870, and looks like a beat up Neil Young (if that's not redundant). Two Big Thumbs up for "Born to Battle". It's highly recommended and the picture is good but not razor sharp. ////
That's all for this evening. I hope you had a nice weekend. I send you Tons of Love, as always.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo :):)
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