Hi everyone. In continuing our story of the Reading Center aftermath (and our ongoing 1983 investigation), I want to talk a little bit about some movie-title triggers from around that time (January 30 through early February), and also about the four L.A. area Rush concerts that I mentioned in the last blog.
If you are a regular reader, you know about my 1980s movie lists, and how the titles of those movies can trigger memories of movie dates with Lilly. I have recovered many memories through the use of this technique, even using films we didn't see, or didn't see together. The latter is the case with "The Entity" and "Videodrome", both of which were released on Friday, February 4, 1983, just five days after Super Bowl Sunday and the Chi-Chi's/Gary Patterson Incident.
My friends and I (or Lilly and I) often saw movies on (or close to) their weekend of release, and whenever I thought of "The Entity" over the years (even long before I thought about 1983), I remembered three things:
1) That I saw it with friends, not with Lillian (who did not like horror films). 2) That it was one of the scariest films ever made. 3) That the movie title triggered a feeling of depression. I think I wrote about this in a previous blog. The memory had a residue of melancholy because after the movie, we (Grimsley, me, and one of his friends), had parked near the Northridge mall and "gotten stoned". Even when I was a regular pot smoker for 19 years, I never liked smoking in the daytime. It always left me with a feeling of ennui, like my life was passing by, and in this case, after "The Entity", I remembered that the melancholia had to do with Lilly, and in retrospect, I thought it meant, "There I was, 'hanging out with my buddies, getting stoned' when I should've been with my beautiful girlfriend".
But when the Chi-Chi's memory was recently recovered and quickly became ironclad and 100% verified, I reconsidered the "Entity" trigger.
What was I really depressed about that day? I wondered. Meditating on that question caused a notion to "bubble up":
I remembered that Lilly had been sick all week, and had not been in school. And because she went to CSUN, this meant I had not seen her. This notion opened a vein of information. "Videodrome" triggered a similar feeling (and it was also a horrible movie).
I began to remember that Lilly missed several weeks of school at this time. How many weeks? 2, maybe 3. Her reason was that she had the flu (a really bad case). More meditations showed that I called her (or she called me) every other day or so for an update on her condition. As the days passed, I began to worry. A normal case of flu lasts, what? A week at most? I wanted her to be well. In addition, her attendance at CSUN was how we saw each other on weekdays. My memory of "The Entity" now showed that I was concerned about Lilly as we sat in Grimsley's car and smoked pot. He may have enquired about her in an insinuating way, which made me feel even worse about "hanging out and smoking pot with 'the boys' " (ala the memory trigger).
Fast forward now to a third "movie trigger": "The King of Comedy". That Scorsese flick (starring DeNiro) opened on Friday February 18. I remembered seeing it in Westwood, once again with Grimsley (long before he acquired that nickname). "King of Comedy" triggered something...but I couldn't tell what. It took a second meditation to unearth the corresponding emotion. When it "bubbled up", I was surprised.
The feeling was "happy day". When I went to see that movie, I had just gotten the news that Lilly was about to return to school after being out more than two weeks with the flu.
Of course, I had no awareness of the Chi-Chi's Incident at the time. Nor the Reading Center Incident and it's aftermath. All I knew was that Lillian had had the flu - for three weeks. I'd been very worried about her, but now she was better and was going to return to school. Maybe after President's Day, which was Monday February 21, 1983.
That narrative rang a strong bell.
But then I wondered, "What about the Rush concerts? I know I went to at least one of those."
I meditated further. The first Rush show was at the Long Beach Arena on February 14. Valentine's Day. I used that as a marker. I still wasn't sure which show I went to, or if I went to more than one, but I was sure I (or we) must've bought tickets in advance, which would've been before all the trouble started. When would the tickets have gone on sale? In 1983, they didn't promote concerts six to nine months in advance like they do now. I figured the Rush shows went on sale somewhere between mid-November and mid-December 1982. In those days, I still had some money from unemployment checks. Because of the recession, President Reagan had Federally extended the unemployment to an unprecidented 18 months. Thus, I continued to get checks until mid-1983 (more on that subject in a future blog), and it meant I had money to go to all four Rush shows if I chose to. Concert tix were only 15 to 20 bucks in those days.
But I was certain I went to at least one show, and I was guessing Lilly went with me, or had planned to go, and I figured we must've bought our tickets when they went on sale in late 1982. We hadn't gone to many major concerts in '82. The one big show would've been a dream for Lilly and me: Cheap Trick and Rainbow were gonna co-headline The Forum! I was driving an old, red Phymouth Valiant at the time. I remember taking it over the hill to a ticket broker to buy a pair of front row center seats for the two of us. But it turned out too good to be true. The concert got cancelled. Talk about getting the rug pulled out from under...
But getting back to the Rush concerts in Feb. 1983, the first one was on Valentine's Day, as noted. I thought, It makes sense that we might've bought our tickets for that show, since it was Valentine's Day and also the first one on the four-night L.A. run. I still wasn't sure, but I used it as a marker, and meditated on the concerts again, as a whole. In memory recovery, you never "lead the mind on". You never pre-suppose anything because it can paint a false picture. Therefore (or for instance in this case), since I was 100% sure I attended at least one of those Rush concerts, but unsure which one, or if Lilly attended with me, I set what I call an "umbrella" over all four dates. Then I used the protocols of self-hypnotic meditation (the most important of which is a blank mind) to allow the subconscious to reveal whatever data it might release, based on the intent of that meditation.
Here is what arose: I began to get notions of riding in Lilly's car ("Peanut", her Audi 5000). I was in the passenger seat. Dave Small was in back. The three of us were going to one of the Rush concerts. Which one was still unclear, but I maintained the Valentine's Day "marker". Lilly said something about "breaking her (curfew?)" or "getting out of her house" (escaping?). This would've been during the time she supposedly had the flu.
Here's where things got really strange. Because of this, I'm going to couch the details.
Lilly told me and Dave that she did not have the flu, that it was just a concocted story. She said that because it was Valentine's Day, or because it was the night of the concert (or both), that she "made them" let her out of the house. Keep in mind that all of this is only two weeks after the Chi-Chi's Incident, the Reading Center Incident, the aftermath of those incidents, and everything I've reported about my own experience during that time (early February 1983).
Lilly then proceeded to tell me and Dave an exceedingly unusual story about her own experience during that time. In the meditation, my reaction to her story came back somewhat clearly. I said, "It's not that I don't believe you, it's that I'm having trouble with the (science-fiction) aspect because I don't know much about...(redacted).
Dave said, "I believe you, Lillian."
Lilly said to me: "I need you to believe me, too."
I repeated my answer. "I do believe you. It's just that that other part's a stretch. But I'll take your word for it."
Lilly swore me and Dave to secrecy. I remember Dave's exact words: "You can count on me, Lillian".
He seemed to have no doubt of what she was saying.
I would soon learn (not long after the concert) that she was telling the truth about everything she said.
I still don't know the exact date of the Rush concert, nor exactly when Lilly returned to school.
Two incidents happened after the concert that are staggering to remember.
One of them happened in my bedroom at 9032.
The other happened at Lilly's house a few days later (date unsure). That's all I can tell you right now, but our narrative will continue in a couple of days.
Thanks for reading, tons of love, back soon.
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