Is Everything Okay? (very frustrating)

Hi Elizabeth,

I am just wondering if everything is okay, cause you haven't posted since Saturday, at least I haven't seen anything on the newsfeed, and I've been looking. I hope all is well. I am at home, watching a Japanese anthology horror movie called "Kwaidan". I am gonna go for part of my walk in a few minutes, but I will be around on my usual schedule, here and at Pearl's, all day and evening. Let me know what's going on.

I Love You.  xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxo  :):)

12:20am : Hi again. I saw one post from you around 6pm, of a mountain landscape, but that was all. It was a nice picture, seemed like it was one of your friends who posted it, so maybe it was just an ordinary FB "like". I don't know. I am guessing something is wrong. I know you are busy with your work, but even the busiest people still seem to be on FB, so I don't think it's just that.

Sigh.

Y'know, Elizabeth, I've written and written, and I've tried to be supportive in every way. I've done it all on a one-way basis, too, since you never respond in words to me.

I really do love and care for you, but this pattern of non-communication always reappears sooner or later. That's why I've simply stopped writing blogs on days when you don't post.

Something has got to change with this pattern. I have only ever asked for just small changes, small steps to improve our communication, such as you letting me know at what future date you might want to have direct communication once again. But even that small step has never been taken. The only steps taken seem to be these regressions, where you just stop communicating altogether. And you've got my computer hacked to boot.

I am gonna be 56 in half a year. I don't wanna fool around with all this stuff any longer. Either you want me in your life or you don't. As you know, I think it's been great the way you have taken off this year. I'm sure a lot of people are clamoring for your time. No problem. I have always been willing to write, and have never asked for anything but small advancements. And yet nothing happens, and then I get snubbed once again.

I am not gonna do this any more, after the first of the year, if things don't improve. You can decide if you want that to happen. I don't mean to put pressure on you, but then I am not sure your heart is in it anymore. It's not enough for this just to be a computer relationship. I put everything I can into this - over 800 blogs - and you have your life and friends, and many guys who like you, and I just either need to have some progress made here or I can't do it anymore. It doesn't take much to communicate every day.

Anyway, I am still here, and I still feel the same way (and I always will). But I just can't be simply a one way communicator without any response, and beyond that, it's gotta become direct by the New Year, or at the very least, some small increment of improvement. It can't just be status quo anymore.

I will hope to hear from you in the morning.

I Love You.