Hi (me)

Hi Elizabeth,

I am here, of course, but I have no idea what's going on. There's no point in my speculating about it, because that doesn't do any good if you don't wanna tell me. I hope nothing bad has happened, and that you are okay, but other than that, I don't know what I can say. Whatever it is, I will be here if you feel like posting. I will be back in a little while at 11:30 to write more.

Adam

11:45pm : Hi again. I guess I will continue my theme, since nothing else is happening. I said last night that maybe the subject matter is the problem, but if so I cannot imagine why. Things like missing time and ufo stories are mainstream subjects now, seen on the History Channel on programs like "Ancient Aliens" and other shows. Heck, they even have mainstream shows and books that theorize about former civilizations on Mars and the Moon. So, again I don't know what the problem is. I have had to put up with a lot, including getting my Facebook hacked last Summer, and I didn't throw in the towel. I'm still here, and I will continue to be, because I Love You. If you don't feel the same about me anymore, you can tell me. But all the subterfuge, all the secrecy - it's just really hard for me to deal with anymore. But the bottom line is always that I Love You, so whatever is going on, it's okay, meaning : don't worry about it.

People are gonna have to get real about what goes on in the world. As you know, I generally don't even mention it, let alone dwell on it. I prefer to focus on the Good, which is everywhere. However, I have had, in my life, a monumental experience that needs to be explored, for evidence, for acknowledgement, and in a search for truth and for what is right.

Consequently, if there are people out there (and I don't mean you) who are spooked by such subjects, or don't believe in them, that is not my problem. All I can do is move forward, toward what I am seeking. As you know, I am mainly a guy who just wants to live my life and enjoy each day. I believe in spreading good energy around and being a positive person, but I have had one huge problem, and that is that nobody seems to want to really talk to me, or to be with me. Consequently, I am by myself most of the time when I am not working. I know why this is, too, and it is because of what happened to me in 1989.

Nobody cares, or to put a finer point on it, they all just wanted it to go away, because it was way to unusual, and therefore too scary, for them to deal with.

But I care, and because of that, nobody really wants to talk to me, unless it is about superficial stuff.

Again, Elizabeth, I do not mean you here. I am just talking about my own life, my own circle. And I love my friends, don't get me wrong, and I am also not complaining, because I am very blessed. However, it's still true that I have nobody to really talk to. About real stuff. And that's hard.

But, as an Aries, :) , I am extremely resilient. So what I have done for the past 20 years is to study. I study all kinds of weird stuff, so long as it comes from an intelligent, well-informed source, because I know better than to simply live an American life at face value. If people wanna do that, God Bless 'Em, but don't judge me, thanks. I mean nobody any harm.

I am just not into stupidity, superficiality, irony, idiot pop culture, duplicitous politics, manufactured news, or any other form of baloney in the modern age. You already know that about me, and you also know I don't dwell on all that negative stuff either. All anyone has to to is read what I generally write, to know what kind of person I am.

But because I have had no one to talk to, I decided I might as well re-direct my writing energy, or at least part of it, to what happened to me in 1989, because it is HUGE.

It is huge, and when I say that, you really have no idea. I could tell you, but then it would begin the cycle again, of the subject that no one wants to talk about or hear about. But for me, it's not right for me to let it go, but I would, if a person actually wanted to talk to me, and to be with me. But no one ever has wanted to.

Anyway, enough for now. I was gonna write about my own experience with missing time, but I will have to save it for another night. Tonight I am tired.